My friend Ana was being so hard on herself the other day while asking me, why is it that she has these radical mood changes so unsettling, as oppose to her husband that is so calm and seems so constantly emotionally stable…
So, first I think we can agree that Ana is not alone. We women have a very intense hormonal life. The chemistry of the brain can change in some women up to 25% every month, producing mood changes and often a sense of being lost. And if it’s not our normal hormonal cycle that creates the abrupt shifts there is another tendency…When a woman is stressed and overwhelmed it’s because her oxytocin levels are low. Most of the multitasking activities we do today drain our oxytocin levels, and we need to be aware and take care of that. Women need to produce plenty of oxytocin to feel relaxed and recharged and happy with themselves. There are very precise activities to balance the oxytocin production. I use some of them in my sessions and my meditations.
Men in the other hand need testosterone to feel relaxed. They produce the same amount of oxytocin than us women but is testosterone what calms their nervous system. To get these two hormones released in the body we need different activities and approaches for each one. So a stress management session for men wouldn’t be at all structured the same way that the one for women. And acknowledging this difference is key to stop comparing and start making the best use of our capacity to complement each other.
I personally love working with women because in my experience in average we are mostly open to do the inner work. Women come ready (even if they are freaking out) to make the change happen. Also because anything you give to a women she usually will share it or use it to better her environment, her community, her family life. I was stunish reading a study of the World Bank that proves that when women earn money in poor communities they invest in their families and in bettering the lives of those around her much more than men. They are a key factor of change an improvement of the quality of life in their surrounding. I see it over and over again: when a woman feels well, everything around her benefits from it.
In my daily life I also constantly see women feeling fear to produce breakthrough and struggling with low self esteem, not only during their hormonal cycles but all the year round. It has become part of our socialization. And part of my work’s intention is for us women to gain confidence, and trust in our inner resources. In our capacity to sustain ourselves emotionally, financially, and relate to others from this place of alignment with our core energy; to have a mindset of unapologetic self nourishment and constant expansion into new levels of awareness and self-love.
I sincerely think that the future of humanity depends on the empowerment of women, especially in poor areas of the world. I always suggest to start where we are and create a butterfly effect. I am giving my grain of sand for this expansion to happen. Are you with me?
If you are in Berlin join me in RENEW a transformational day for women that want to take their lives to a next level. IT#s on the 18th of February from 10am to 6pm. Click here to know more.